AF: Well you know like I mentioned a few minutes ago I was in a really really severe depression. And my doctor and I had increased the doses of my medications and I had really awful side effects from just that dose increase and not getting really much benefit at all so I couldn’t stay on that. And at that point I was, you know, “what do I do here” you know, “can I switch medications?” And you know then we had that discussion about the TMS. And really I was pretty desperate. I hardly get out of bed in the morning and whether or not the other health condition was doing well or not. I just felt like I had no energy my life was just you know drawing to a complete halt in everything – social, work, whatever or just daily functioning. So you know I went through the screening process and was excited to find out that you know I qualified for the TMS treatment and it would be covered by my insurance because of my long history with medication, you know years. And you know the first couple weeks – well let’s put it this way: the first appointment period was to what they called map what you know the treatment and so they figured out what level would be appropriate for me in terms of intensity. And you know so I went in for the first appointment already knowing a little bit about what to expect from treatment. And you know at first you know I really didn’t notice much of anything and it’s short and it’s easy. And your technician you know kind of either chats with you or they’ll stay quiet if you wanted to stay quiet but for the most part it’s like completely pain-free. The sound doesn’t bother me and the intensity level was always a little bit adjustable you know to my needs for that particular day. And in a few weeks I did notice some changes, some more improvements but I also did notice that I had some brief trauma that I hadn’t completely processed through and I had an experience with some of that coming back up again. But I stuck with it and I’m just so just pleased to say that you know working through that with all the therapeutic tools and then having the TMS on on board as well slowly things started to increase and it was a little bit difficult to notice but you know you do fill out a tracking form with your you know different moods and your activities and how your depression and anxiety symptoms are. And I did kind of notice that maybe my numbers were trending upward without really knowing and seeing all them together. But you know by the time we got to the last two weeks just a dramatic improvement hit me and I was bouncing out of bed with more energy than I can remember having you know for so long. And just really all of a sudden not only being able to take care of like my activities of daily living, which were a struggle, but also getting to some of these like projects that I had put off for so long you know just little things around the house and then some big things. But I felt like I was able to start like making goals again and you know think about like okay my future coming up is so much greater now and “oh my gosh like if I could be one of those people that ends up being able to you know decrease some of my medication with my doctor’s assistance” that you know like it was only just going to keep getting better and I was a little skeptical that it was going to keep improving after the last treatment but it really has. And I can’t even convey to you the number of people in my life that I interact with who have said “what are you doing? Like you just are on fire. You’re smiling you’re happy like this is like we haven’t seen you like this in a couple of years” you know.
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